Ex boyfriend and I have started dating again, but we are both taking it slowly and still seeing other people.
He initiated the breakup, but also initiated contacting me again about a month ago.
I think that you knew that I would come back, and that was enough for you to be convinced. You always said you didn’t want anything serious, and I wanted to keep my options open, too. We were honest with each other about where we stood. I frequently visited my old home, and that made things easy.
That is, until you found out that I was casually dating someone else.
Do you have any advice for waiting it out or nudging him along?
I love him to death and want this to work if there is any way possible- but also understand that I can't seem needy and push him past his level of comfort. The worse thing you can do is appear to want it more than him, if you show anxiety you could lose him for good.
Admittedly we both had faults when we were boyfriend / girlfriend. We both agree what went wrong and dating this time around has been great.
The catch though is I don't know how long I should stay in this holding pattern until he is ready to commit again.
I truly believe that he is just as scared as I am of things going awry between us like they did the first time. My question is, does anyone out there have a similar experience?Between divorce and deciding to date, a highly important personal development needs to occur, what psychologists call "separation and individuation".This maturational process resembles what children go through as they separate from their parents and take responsibility for their lives.Prior to healthy separation, teenagers often blame their parents for their unhappiness, feel like victims and angrily cite their parents' shortcomings (e.g., "they're too self-centered" or "they don't understand me") as causes for the problems.Doesn't this sound uncomfortably similar to the fighting of marital partners as they are breaking up?